My entire life I heard people speak of that they knew exactly where they were when they heard the news of the shooting of JFK. Nothing in my lifetime had that type of impact until the morning of September 11, 2001. I had not gone to school that morning because I had an orthodontic appointment. I turned on Good Morning America - which I rarely do because I'm always racing to get out the door. The first tower was already on fire and I was playing catch up to try to make sense of what I was seeing. Then, the 2nd plane flew into the 2nd Tower. It was if everything played in slow motion for those few seconds. I got in my car and put it on news radio which I NEVER do and when I got to my appointment, they had the coverage playing on TV. Suddenly, we saw the 1st tower crumble and I lost my breath. My eyes filled with tears knowing the loss of life would be devastating. The rest of the day all I could think about were the victims - both in the towers and planes - that everyone was going about their morning - business as usual- never realizing this was their last moments on Earth. I hoped they hugged their kids that morning. I hope they told their loved ones they loved them before heading out the door. Like all Americans, my heart hurt for those that lost so much that day.
I went to NYC a few years after. The site was under construction but we went into the little church that was protected from the fateful events that surrounded this historical house of worship. This church was used as a safe haven for volunteers and rescue workers. It was somber to say the least. I remember being tired from walking that day and sat on a pew toward the front as my friends finished the tour. I caught something out of the corner of my eye and looked down the pew. Tears instantly began streaming down my face as I saw a dusty fireman's jacket and boots placed there. The realization that some man or woman sat there - completely exhausted, feelings of utter helplessness as the rescue mission quickly turned to a recovery mission - taking rest in a place that was designed to comfort those in need was more than overwhelming.
Over Labor Day week-end a few friends and I went to NYC. I hadn't been in a few years so I was beyond excited to go. I was going to blog the events of my trip in order, but since today is special - I knew you wouldn't mind if I skipped ahead. ;) On Monday morning, September 7th - Crystal, Julie, Kya and I headed to the 9/11 memorial(the first for me). Once inside, it took me a little while to realize that this was built on top of the foundation of the Twin Towers. My eyes filled with tears more than once and I had chills as I heard voices from survivors and those who did not survive from recordings to loved ones or from air phones. I stood at the steps that provided an escape route for some and imagined someones sister, brother, mother, father hurrying down those steps with fear flowing through every vein.
I moved along and came upon the burned out firetruck and ambulance. I swear I could still smell the burned steel. It was so much to take in. My heart was so heavy as I stood in the silent hallways of the memorial with only the sounds of lite footsteps. No one was asked to be quiet. Everyone knew this was special and wanted to treat this ground with dignity and respect for those that lost their lives on in this exact space.
Once we moved outside toward the fountain. All the images finally had names attached. Although there were no names I knew and families represented I will never meet, I stood there with my hand on those names and prayed for peace and comfort for those that are left here to carry on. I wondered how the families have moved forward in these last 14 years. Young children at that time, have probably headed off to college to begin new chapters for themselves, maybe spouses have remarried.... I pray they have found joy in the midst of tragedy. I pray they have been able to pick up the pieces of that horrific day and find a way to live each day to the fullest knowing that none of us are guaranteed another day on Earth.
As we walked down the street with the memorial in the distance, it was a while before our group really engaged in conversation with each other. There were no words that any of us had that could fully express the emotions we were all feeling - just a deep sense of sorrow.
Things I have continued to ponder as a take away from the memorial:
1) Life is precious and we should not waste of minute!
2) NYC has a strength that can be felt. I heart NYC
3) I will never forget those that lost so much!
(from l to r - Me, Julie, Crystal, Kya)
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